I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
