dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
