Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
