Already got asked if we're dating
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
