he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
