dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
