I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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