She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
