Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize