OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
