google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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