god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize