i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
