dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
