i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
