My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
