I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I am midnight drunk by noon
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
