Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
