Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Randomize
