Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
