if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
So much rum. So many feels.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
