Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
