You're completely useless in the revolution.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
