He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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