hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
