Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize