there's paper in my vomit.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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