yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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