I can tuck mytits in my pants
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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