hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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