Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
