I'm eating all of the evidence.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
