butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
