I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
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