they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
