You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
this just has baby written all over it
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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