I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
