we're blogging at a bar
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
