we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
