they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Randomize
