he puts the penis in happiness.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize