in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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