Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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