I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
