p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I cut my penus on the lid.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
