perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
