Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now

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(770): View more from Georgia

Tell her she's as useless as a condom.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to

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(720): View more from Colorado

its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day

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(229): View more from Georgia

Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.

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(517): View more from Michigan

On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.

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