Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
