I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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