Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
should my penis look like a turkey
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
